My kitchen is super ugly. I am not being dramatic. My kitchen is one of the worst I’ve ever seen, with every single element of “What the fuck went wrong here?”: overhead lighting, brown and beige and ochre linoleum floors, pine cabinets, a refrigerator that has a lot going for it over the former one (it actually works) but is just hideously enormous, the worst but not the only example of everything being in the wrong place.

“I am truly